October 13

A Teacher’s Life for Me: #TeacherTales, #StudentStories

As with any teacher, we all have more stories than we could ever begin to tell. I started keeping track of some of mine and titled them #TeacherTales #StudentStories. I thought I would share a few of them with you here in this post. Enjoy!

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Answer received on a Gatsby Quiz:
Question: Who is hit by a car and killed?
“The person who got hit”

Question: Who was driving the car?
“The driver”

“Jason” <– Who is this??!!

Question: Who do you think is at fault and why?
“Murl, He shouldn’t have been there where he had a chance to get hit but the driver should have been paying attention.”
“I think Tom is at fault because he didn’t like George so he decided to kill him.”

WHAT BOOK ARE THESE GUYS READING???!!!

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Yesterday, I gave my classes index cards and asked them to write down their top three areas that they felt they needed just a little more help with before they take their state tests next week. Here are some of the real life answers I got. I love️ my students!

“My attion spand”
“When you have to finish the sentence and none of the answer choices relate to each other and they all seem to fit well.” <– I HATE this type of question too. Pick the “best” answer.
“hifans”
“grammar, school, life”
“wordiness”

And my favorite:
“It smells like feet in there.”

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Overheard in class:

Student 1: “A kid I know lost his scholarship after his grades went down.”

Student 2: “WAIT…your grades count even AFTER you’re in college?!”

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After a lengthy discussion on whether or not you would ask a student’s grandparents to dial a phone or press the buttons to make a call, (he said press while I said dial because you have to be aware of your audience), student asks me: “But why would you need to change what you have to say depending on your audience? Just say what’s right.”

I replied: “So that you are speaking their vernacular and not being pedantic.”
His expected reply: “Huh?”
Me: “See?”

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Student: “Is the movie version of Romeo & Juliet just like 50 Shades of Gray?”

Umm….No. No it’s not. Not in any way.

 

 

 

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At Open House tonight, I had a PARENT ask if there would be any reading.

Me: Well, it is a literature class soooooo I’m gonna say yes. Yes, there will be reading.

 

 

 

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I offered a student a piece of candy today. He replied with, “meh. I’m on my way to type II diabetes anyway. Might as well close the gap.”

 

 

 

 

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I was passing back papers today. When I laid one on a particular student’s desk, he murmured, “mmm….look at God!”

 

 

 

 

 

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Student: “Is Connecticut a state or a city?” (Quick reminder, I teach high school.)

 

 

 

 

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Student was looking for a word to use in his research paper. He says to me, “You know…like a crack circle.”

The word he was looking for was rehabilitation.

 

Teaching is fun. Teaching teenagers is the best. There’s just no other way around it.

September 15

Truth, Sarcasm, and Diet Dew

Here we are. First blog post. Steeped in truth, sarcasm, and Diet Dew (my caffeine drink of choice).

Welcome.

As a high school teacher, we are expected to educate and lead these young folks who have been entrusted in our care. Many times, these young people are not used to hearing the truth. Or they hear it wrapped in bubblegum and air pockets.

My truth is wrapped in sarcasm and Diet Dew. Teenagers understand the language. it becomes common ground between myself and them. Being real with students allows them to be real with you.

Students may think they want sugar coated feedback, but in reality…they do not. They want the adults in their life to be as real as possible with them. Especially when it is a life lesson or truth they need to hear.

One prime example of sarcasm I use in the classroom is with my classroom rules and procedures. I have funny memes (which let’s face it, is just visual sarcasm) sprinkled throughout my slideshow and on posters and signs around my room.

So many articles have been written with glaring warnings about avoiding sarcasm in the classroom. Please. Get outta here with that mess.  If you can’t speak a foreign language, I would advise not attempting it in a classroom. Same applies to sarcasm. If you cannot speak it effectively and in the humorous vein that it is intended, then do not attempt it. You will fall flat and potentially get yourself in huge trouble.

One of my favorite teacher comedians has multiple examples of sarcasm in the classroom. Some of it we say out loud. Other times we keep it inside.

So there ya go. A little bit of truth and a whole lot of sarcasm. What sort of experiences have you had in speaking the teen language of sarcasm?

Stay tuned.

 

 

All images from Wikimedia Commons is license under GNU Free Documentation and Creative Commons ShareAlike 3.0.